Thinking About Getting Into a Long-Distance Relationship?

6/25/2012 5:40 PM

When it comes to your dating life, things aren't always black-and-white or uncomplicated. They almost never are, in fact. So what happens if you meet someone, either online or off, that you really like, but then you learn they don't live anywhere near you? If you've deemed the situation worthy of pursuing regardless of distance, there are some things that you should prepare yourself for.

First things first: The worst thing about long distance relationships is, far and away, the actual distance. "A four hour trip isn't so bad," you'll tell yourself. "Being a time zone or two apart is nothin'," you'll try to make yourself believe. But after the first few trips, when things settle in a bit and you're stuck on the highway burning? gallon after gallon of gas or waiting in the airport security line for what feels like the zillionth time, you're going to start to really, reallllly notice how far apart the two of you are. And that's a sucky realization.

Second: You're going to have to come to terms with the idea that they may not want to eventually move to where you live. This is great if you're itching for a reason to get out, but not so great if you already love where you live.? If this is a huge issue for you, you're probably going to want to bring that up sooner rather than later in order to avoid any huge problems down the road. While it might seem weird bringing up something that serious early on, it'd weed out any potential reasons not to do it, right?

Third: Be prepared for the loneliness that can come along with long distance love. When your squeeze is states away, and you've had a rough day and want to just snuggle up? Forget about it. Saturday night and all your once-single friends have paired off, leaving you alone and bored? The closest you'll get to a date is watching a movie and staying on the phone or hanging out on webcam chat.

Fourth: Your relationship won't work the same way as other people's do. You'll feel like an impenetrable force, because you aren't together enough to fight. You'll feel super in-love, because the time you do spend together will be short and much-cherished. The problem with this is it can give a false sense of commitment to the relationship and make you think the two of you are ready for more serious endeavors when, in actual totaled-up time, you've spent only a month together.

Long distance relationships, like short-distance relationships, aren't inherently doomed to fail, though. With the right person, they can work just fine?they just tend to take a lot more time and effort to keep them going, as the old saying proves: "Out of sight, out of mind." If you're certain you want to be with someone who lives far away, go forth with caution.

photo from Morguefile

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